From the files of: Things that make you go EWWW

We all pretty much know I like shoes. So when I see people’s shoes that I like, often I make a mental note – like “Oh, Susie has cool shoes on today.” And then I think maybe I’ll ask where she got them at some point if there’s a chance for conversation. But every now and then, my propensity to notice shoes works against me. Because this afternoon in the ladies’ room, I noticed the shoes in the stall next door. I noticed them because I had noticed them earlier today. Because they’re cool. And so I knew it was Susie (to my knowledge there is not actually someone name Susie in this building). And Susie flushed, and opened the stall and walked out the bathroom door.

I will never shake Susie’s hand again.

Now I know that there probably has to be a relatively high percentage of people – even smart, otherwise well adjusted adults – who don’t regularly wash their hands after using the bathroom. We all know in the back of our minds. (Think about it, if we didn’t all know this, the anti-bacterial hand lotion franchise would be a lot less wealthy than they are.) But most of us resist the urge to go all Adrian Monk or Howard Hughes. But I’m teetering. Because it’s one thing to know something like that in the back of your mind and it’s a totally other thing to witness it first hand. Even if you’re not normally a hand-washer, wouldn’t the peer pressure of knowing someone else is in there too send you to the sink like a good little germaphobe? And now? Now I’ve spent entirely too much time thinking about something that no grown up should have to spend time thinking about unless they’re working on instilling good habits in their small, impressionable child. Bleah.