Fly, little birdie. Fly.

And just like that, eldest is off to Liberty University to continue his pursuit of higher education with an aim toward some sort of pastoral ministry or missions (or, tertiary consideration and the subject of his second major, psychology in some manner or other.) The trip down was...fraught. But it all worked out in the end.

The plan was to leave on Tuesday, around 1 or so, so that we could get to the hotel and settle a bit before heading to supper and just making it an easy evening. Now, I had been gently suggesting (with varying interpretations of the word "gently") that he begin packing for roughly 80 million days only to be told that he had it under control and it wasn't going to be an issue. Despite, of course, nothing having actually been packed.

But whatever. He's an adult. College is for him to figure out. It's time for me to step back and breathe.

Monday night, he asks if his friends can come over. I casually remind him that we want to leave at 1 and he's yet to pack and his response is that he's going to do it in the morning. When I asked when he usually got up and moving, his response was that he was setting an alarm and getting up early. So okay. Sure. I trust you.

(Narrator: I did not trust him. I knew it was going to end badly. But it allowed me to begin resetting my own expectations a little early. So win?)

Friends, that boy did not get up until noon. 

We did not leave at 1. Or 2. Or even 3.

No, it was fully 4 o'clock when we finally pulled out of the garage to embark on the three and a half hour drive.

You can then imagine that we did not have a laid back and relaxing evening, as we all arrived in Lynchburg teetering on the edge of hangry and generally annoyed.

That hangry incited a meltdown by his college-ness about how this was stupid and he didn't even want to do this and he wasn't going to make friends and it was awful and...panic. It was change-induced panic.

Food helped. So did sleep. But the next morning, move-in day, he was still not completely embracing the grand adventure of it all and I was metaphorically biting my nails about the whole experience while trying to be outwardly jovial and encouraging (not my normal go-tos, as you can imagine.)

Thankfully - and seriously, it could only be God - as the day progressed, we had more and more interactions that confirmed for all of us that this was exactly where he was meant to be. And after a time of prayer on the lawn (put on by the college and really just a fabulous experience), we left him to finish setting up his room and settle in and returned to the hotel with a hysterical younger brother who just had it hit home that his brother was not coming with us.

In the morning on Thursday, I texted that we were up and would like to hang out for a few minutes before we headed home and how was he doing? And he texted back that he'd made like ten new friends, they already had a group chat going and lots of plans for the day but that if we could bring him some hangars, he'd meet us in between all the fun he had planned to say goodbye.

Which is exactly as it should be.

I haven't cried. I'm not sure I will. It is oddly quiet and the house feels just a little...off now. But the new normal will settle in and we'll go down for parent's weekend in September and he'll be home for fall break in October. So it's really not all that bad. And I am grateful to see him flapping his wings and praying that he will catch an air current and soar into all that God has for his future.

At the risk of being a Luddite

As we're prepping eldest for college, I find myself more and more annoyed by the current trend toward putting everything online -- and only online.

Basically, I miss paper.

Eldest is struggling with being nervous about this big change (not unwarranted - it's a big change!) and as I've been pondering the situation and trying to help him navigate, I can only think back to how things were when I was heading off myself.

What I remember most? The HUGE packets of information that I was sent. Schedules of orientation week activities. Maps. Rules. Suggestions. Checklists. All on paper. So I could get to them easily and highlight them or check them off etc.

And most of that information (probably all of it) is available. But it's in an email sent to his college email account and then you have to find the link and click it and then scroll and then click and...by the time you find it, you can say "aha"...and then if you need it again, you have to do allll that discovery over again.

It's so much more overwhelming. I'm overwhelmed and I'm not the one who really needs the information. Is it any wonder that he's struggling?

I'm tempted to start wholesale printing things, except that he's going to have to figure out how to navigate it all, since this seems to be the way of the world. But honestly, paper is underrated.

We'll get through it. 40 days until move in - he chose the bright and early 8 a.m. move in time (I suspect, since he procrastinated and then had a hard time finding which portal to log into and how to do it blah blah blah that's all that was left. But it's fine. I'd already reserved a hotel for the night before, so we're good there.)

It's fine. It's all going to be fine.

If I say it enough, will it be true?

Back in my day...

We're at the 54 day mark before eldest heads off to college and, as it's also Prime days at Amazon, Big Brother seems to know that they should inundate me with all the ads for college dorm necessities.

Boy, it's a lot.

And also...I'm so confused.

Back in my day (and yeah yeah, I'm old), I packed up my clothes, bedding, my shelf stereo with CD player AND cassette capability, my state of the art desktop computer running Windows 3.1 and I was good to go. Oh, and an answering machine. I really think that's all I took. There might have been a framed photo or two.

Now?

Everyone apparently neeeeeds a mattress topper. And the numbers and varieties that are available are mind numbing. Memory foam. Gel. Cooling. Cooper infused. Set up like a bottom sheet to elastic all the way around. Just a rectangle that sits on top. Down filled. Two inches. Four inches. 

Just...it's baffling.

Also suggested are rolling carts. Skinny drawer collections (some with casters, some without). All manner of over-the-door hanging organizing things. "Safes" that are lockable boxes, basically, that hook to your bed to also be a desk type thing. Fans. (Oh my word, the fans.) And Fan stands that hook to the bed. Charging stations. Rugs. Removable wallpaper.

Honestly, if you can think of something that could possibly go into a college dorm room, I guarantee there are at least sixteen people selling them as "essentials that you'll regret not having."

I've asked eldest which, if any, of these things he needs and/or wants and he just shrugs. Which...maybe that's good? But I suspect what will really happen is we'll get ready to pack the car and he'll realize that he doesn't have anything he actually needs and so we'll be trying to navigate WalMart or Target (or both) when we get down to school. (And I mean, fine. If that's what we gotta do, that's what we gotta do.) Of course, this is the same kid who, when I was reminding him to go in and reserve his move in time and talking about logistics, looked at me completely confused and said, "Wait. Why are you going to be there?"

So there's that.

(*To be fair, hubby's parents put him on a plane and said bon chance. So I know there are families that do that. But...I am not that mom. At least not for freshman year.)

And Just Like That

Eldest is a high school graduate and also in possession of an Associate's degree in Biblical Studies. He has eschewed walking (which would have been down at Liberty U today), although he has promised that he will walk in four years with his two Bachelor's degrees. I'm holding him to that.

We now enter the ticking time-bomb that is the summer between high school and college. I'm tempted to measure the space in hours, but I don't actually think that would be healthy for either of us. As it is, I'm trying to cram as much family fun as he'll allow into it (read: not all that much because he wants to hang with his friends. Totally legit. But annoying. And yet still legit.) Some of which may be season passes to the amusement park, as we can all go together and just say hi as we pass on our way to different rides. I believe some of his friends are also getting passes, so it kills all the birds with the same, not actually all that expensive, stone.

And we begin to transition the younger boy into taking on the chores that have, heretofore, fallen to the elder boy. He's not excited to have their bathroom now become his sole responsibility, but as it's for his sole use, it feels legit to do.

That tempus, it does fugit.

A Week Without Meds

Youngest boy has been on some variety of ADHD stimulant for six years (?) now. I think we've tried them all at least once. Some twice. And, in fact, our last change - maybe a year ago now - was back to Adderall. None of them have really done as much as we all (him, me, the psychiatrist) feel they should. Unless we dose him so high he doesn't eat. So that's a no-go.

But the Adderall was doing enough that we were trying to fiddle around with other things to boost the efficacy here and there and it was reasonable. Ish.

Then, last week, it was time to refill. The way they handle stimulants is infuriating (and brought to you by the aholes who misuse these meds for cheap highs.) but I get the necessity. Mostly. Anyway, our doctor usually sends in three 30-day prescriptions at each appointment so we don't have to get her to send a new one in every 30 days. Cool. The CVS app said we had two fills left. But...there was no "request refill" button. Instead there was a note saying they needed a new prescription.

I was confused, but I called and left them a message. They called back and said yes, they needed a new prescription. So whatever. I emailed the doctor and explained the situation. She sent in a new one for me.

Now, the app was showing "this medication needs a preauthorization." Pardon me, what? He's been on it for a year. And it's basically the first thing doctors try (unless they like Ritalin better, in which case it's the second) for ADHD. 

Another call to the pharmacy nets an assurance that that's what the system is telling them. It's an insurance issue not them.

So, fine. I call the insurance company.

After like two hours of various holds, phone menus with only voice options and not numbers to hit, an AI refusal to send me to a freaking person unless I first let them try to solve my problem and then, finally, a helpful individual, it turns out that, because both boys take ADHD meds, and elder boy just got switched from one to another about 2 weeks after a refill, we have exceeded our allotment of 75 pills in a 90 day period. SO they won't fill younger boy's meds until November.

I had...thoughts. So many thoughts.

The guy did describe a horrifically annoying sounding process whereby we might be able to get an override, and I'm keeping it in my back pocket. But for now? We're flying med-free. It is going surprisingly well.

Honestly? It's not all that different. And, on the positive side, when he does freeze up/melt down, he's much less violent and ragey with it. (A little investigation showed that anger/rage is a side effect of Adderall. Cool cool. Pubescent teen boy + medication rage was super fun. Glad I knew that in advance. Oh, wait.)

We've added in a few supplements that also seem to be helping, and at this point, if things keep going this way, I'm going to just kibosh the Adderall when we next see the doc anyway. I would much rather my kids not be on them if they don't have to be.

Teenagers, man.

In...April? Early May? Recentlyish, is the point, eldest boy walked past me and I squinted and asked, "Are your glasses taped together?"

"Yeah," says he, "they broke."

Pushing aside the whole, why didn't you say something conversation that would be much like beating my head against a wall, I said, "Would you like me to see if there's a warranty?"

"Oh. Yeah. Please."

So I call up the eye doctor and there is, in fact, a warranty. Just $50 for a replacement (given the ridiculous amount they cost, that's a steal. Our eye doctor...I like the doctor, but I really need to stop shopping for our glasses there. Except the thought of herding the children to yet another store to do it fills me with a desire to crawl in a hole and die.)

Cool. They order the frames, they'll be in maybe a week, ten days.

They come in. We go get them. They pop out the lenses from the broken glasses and into the new frames and we're in and out fast.

All is good.

Then he heads off to London on his mission trip. Comes home. Goes out with friends the day after he returns. And comes home...without glasses.

Because he wore them swimming.

In a lake.

Because why? No one knows.

Can I wait the 3ish weeks for new glasses from the eye doctor or Costco or whatever? No. No I cannot.

Why, you ask? Well, because he's off on a canoe trip on Friday.

FRIDAY.

Thinking I'm smart, I say, cool, we'll get a copy of the prescription and then head over to Lens Crafters and we'll come home with new glasses. All good, right?

NO. Because not a single Lens Crafters in the NoVa area still has a lab in it. They're now a 7-10 day wait.

When all is said and done, we come home and I order from Zenni Optical and pay more for shipping than I did for the damn glasses and maybe, MAYBE, we will be blessed enough for them to come before he has to leave.

Now I'm off to see about prescription goggles. Because apparently my child needs some.

Proof of Age

Today, a box arrived in the mail that was a rather startling proof of age. It was a "Welcome to OurUniversity!" box for the eldest boy.

He still has his senior year of high school to do (although he's really finishing up his associate's degree during this upcoming year), but he has been pretty set on this school since we visited in the fall. As part of the visit, he could start his application (and they'd waive the fee - woot). So he did.

Last week (week before maybe?) I got his O-fficial grades through his junior year, so we sent off a transcript. It was the last piece he needed.

And he is in.

I had planned to force a few other visits this summer, just to round out a plan B. But I guess that's off the table at this point.

It seems odd to go into his senior year (or heck, the summer after his junior year) with college all but squared away.

I'm still making him take the ACT in July (and probably again after that), because there are scholarships for scores to consider. Plus it's just a good idea.

But for whatever reason, my little doodle boy is old enough to head off to college soon.

The tempus, it does fugit.

The Insanity of Finding a Medical Provider

Whelp.

Today was our check in with the psych for both boys to see how their meds are working and what tweaks we might need, etc. Making some adjustments here and there, all good. But then, she trots out that she things both boys could benefit from OT.

Any manner of things for the younger. Executive Function coaching for the elder.

Y'all. I've done the OT dance so many times before when they were little. I just don't want to start it again. But okay, fine. I called a couple of places nearish (because of course the one the psych recommends is in freaking Arlington. Not surprising given that we drive to McLean to see her, but I am not driving to Arlington 2+ times a week from out here. I don't care if the OTs are gold plated.)

The last one though made me want to beat my head against the wall. The conversation went something like this:

Her: Good afternoon thank you for calling OT Land.

Me: Hi, I'm wondering you're accepting new patients for OT.

Her: That would depend on your insurance.

Me: We have HappyFun Insurance. It looked like you listed them on your website.

Her: Yes, we're in network with them.

Me: Great. So...<insert short explanation of what the boys need.>

Her: We can absolutely do that, but with OT we are looking at a 4 - 5 month wait list for an initial evaluation.

Me, to myself, in my head, at maximum volume -- do you think that might be why I asked about new patients before we started this dance?? Because you could have just said, "Yes, but we have a very long wait list" and I would have hung up.

Yarg.

Anyway, I'll call around a little more, but I suspect that it's going to be the same everywhere we look. I might consider seeing if there's something to the south rather than the north because that would probably be less horrible of a drive. But also grrrr.

We had a BCBA we were working with at the tail end of last year for the youngest. She was amazing. But we were paying out of pocket and yeah, not made of money. I'm in hell with the insurance company trying to get it authorized (it would be funny if it wasn't so awful - one person says call this number, they say call this other number, who then refers back to the first number. No one wants you to actually get information. And that's all only after spending 30 minutes yelling OPERATOR into the phone to try to get past the ridiculous automated system.)

I've been contemplating a part-time job, honestly, just to cover the out of pocket costs so we could just go back to the BCBA, because she was fantastic. But I am not honestly sure I'd make enough to actually cover it. 

The executive functioning thing...if eldest would freaking listen to me and be willing to learn from me, we wouldn't need it. I 100% guarantee that they will give him the same tools I am trying to give him, but our "relationship" at this point means he'll take advice from literally anyone who is not me. (Case in point, the psych was going over some of the things I have been trying to work with him on. I'm sitting there biting my tongue because the urge to say SEE??? SEEEEEEE??????? was very strong. He's all, "Oh, interesting. What a good idea." I lament to hubby that he's going to be the kid who cuts all contact with us as soon as he doesn't need us for money. I'm not even kidding. But I guess it is what it is.)

Done and Dusted

Eldest is o-fficialy a licensed driver as of this morning.

Honestly? Signing him up with this driving school was the best thing I've done in a good bit of time. He was anxious about it the first day, but every day this week he's come back more confident. And, hilariously, the driver dude corrected some things (that I'd been trying to point out before, ahem) in a way that actually clicked.

Yay for non-family-member teachers, I guess? (They can definitely be good things at times. I'm not like many homeschoolers who believe my kids should only ever learn from me.)

Regardless, he's now free to roam at will and I find myself breathing a little sigh of relief that maybe my taxi driving can wane slightly.

Of course, now we have the anxiety of my kid out there on his own in our traffic, but life is full of tradeoffs.

Snarky Desk Ladies

Between most of Friday and going on six hours today, I have been sitting in the waiting lounge of this neuropsych testing office and...I'm kind of appalled at the snarkiness of the front desk ladies. I imagine that they've forgotten that I'm sitting in here, for all that they can see me if they peer over the tops of their monitors. 

But they're doing callbacks to people who have had consultation calls to see if they're interested in moving forward with evaluations and...it's just kind of shocking the commentary they make to each other after hanging up. 

"Oh there's another one wasting our time." 

"Sure you're still thinking about it, just say no."

"If I had a dollar for every time a parent got mad about the cost, I could take a good vacation."

And so forth.

Do they not recognize that a) their assessments are stinking expensive and b) there is actually a lot of thought that a [good] parent is going to put into deciding whether or not to move forward?

Like okay, sure, in a perfect world, the parent would return a call quickly and either schedule or say no thanks, but life with kids is a lot. Life with kids who might need neuropsych evals? Even more.

Dunno. Just kind of taken aback by the complete lack of empathy in the front desk staff here.

Testing, 1, 2, 3

The psychiatrist that both boys see has been suggesting (read: pushing pretty hard) that we have more thorough neuropsych evals for both so we get a fuller picture of what we may (or may not) be dealing with.

We'd already done this once for youngest - six years ago maybe? - and she thought now that he's matured some it was worth doing again. Eldest has never had one. 

Hubs and I hemmed and hawed for quite some time about it, because, essentially, cha-ching.

It's not that we're opposed to spending money when necessary. We're just kind of on the fence about the true "necessity" of the situation. (And I feel like I've said all of this before? But maybe not?) 

Anyway, last week, we finally bubbled to the top of the list for neuropsych at Hopkins (because they take insurance, it seemed worth waiting two years) for youngest. Except it didn't end up being full neuro because "he didn't meet their requirements" for that. So yeah. Probably a waste of time? But I won't know for at least another week.

But today, we kick off a private eval for eldest. Starting with a 2 hour (!) zoom with the parents. To say I am unexcited is a definite understatement. I guess it's good. But meh. Anyway, then Friday and Monday he's at their office for long stretches of time to do the testing. And on the positive side, they can do whatever testing they want because it's not regulated by insurance.

On the other side, we get to pay for it all.

At least with this one I have slightly more optimism that they'll tell us something worth knowing. Of course, I've been wrong before, so I guess we'll just have to see.

And he's back

Eldest is back from his wanderings in Mexico. When he was exhausted from a day of travel and I picked him up at the airport, he had lots to say on the way home. I really enjoyed hearing about his trip without having to pry every answer out of him as if it were an interrogation. 

Sadly, he has reverted back to his normal reticent self now that he's been home a few days and while I had hoped to continue the conversation and, dare I hope more, turn over a new leaf in our ability to have what I would see as a more normal relationship it was, alas, not to be.

Ah well.

The meme that says: Texting (or talking) with a teenager is like texting someone who's just not into you.

Yeah, I feel that.

Maybe it's as it should be. Cut the apron strings and so forth. But I feel like they're so cut, I spend many days questioning if they ever existed. At this point, I just pray that later in life he doesn't forget we exist and will toss a scrap of attention in our direction now and again. I say that, and then I realize hubby only reaches out to his family when I force it, so yeah. The prospect isn't bright. Yay?

Still, I'm grateful he had a good trip. He learned a lot. And for a time was willing to share it with me. If they go again next year, he's already said he wants to return. And that's something, too.

Perhaps I can convince him to give learning a little Spanish a try in the intervening time.

And They're Off

The boys are off to camp for the weekend. Looks to be a wet and dreary one ahead and were I part of the madness, I would not be going. But this is why Dad handles all of these sorts of things. There is very little that would entice me to camp in good weather. In rain? Nope.

I think the group chatted last night about cancelling and ultimately decided that the food was purchased and the boys need badges and so they would tough it out. I guess I get that, too.

But again, I'm glad it's not me.

I'm going to see Jesus Christ Superstar downtown with a friend tomorrow. Much more my speed (and yes, we'll have to walk in the rain a little from the parking garage to the theater, but if the weather peeps can be believed, it should be fairly light at the time we're going.)

Maybe there will be some writing. There should be. But we'll see if I can make it happen. I am filled with meh about so many things still. Theoretically it'll pass. But for now. Meh.

Somedays, I swear.

(Hubby would say I swear most days. I'm working on it.)

Youngest has decided it's time to ramp up on all things puberty. In the case of ADHD, this means anything you thought you knew before no longer applies. And anything you think you might find out also does not apply.

Basically, it's even more chaos around here than usual. (Now with more chaos!)

Lawd help.

We did manage to get one med increased (did I say this already? I think maybe I did.) We're a few days in and I think, fingers crossed, touch wood, all that, we might be turning a corner? Except yesterday, he pulls out the "I don't have friends and it's not fair that elder brother does."

Sometimes, all you can do is close your eyes and put your head on the table.

I mean, he's not wrong. (Ish. He has a few friends, but we don't get to see them much because everyone is busy all of the time around here.) He won't go to Sunday school because of how last year worked out, so he's not making friends there. He does go to youth group and Trail Life, but both of those are in the evening and while we give him a medicine boost prior, he just isn't ever at his best in the evenings. So, unsurprisingly, he is not rolling around in friendships.

So I have spent the past day and a half descending into the madness of, "Should I put him in school?"

I mean, not public. I know that would be a bad plan. (Okay, to be fair, I don't know. Because we haven't done it, so I can't know. However, I have very high suspicions that our overcrowded, understaffed public schools would not be thrilled with the addition of my hyperactive, inattentive, and hugely disruptive child. Especially when he's mostly there because he wants to be around people and not because he has any interest at all in learning things.)

Private school? Maybe.

Pushing aside the gasping intake of breath when looking at tuition for same (because holy wow), would it honestly be any better? Or would the private school teachers (who I'm reasonably sure are paid even worse than the public ones -- that was certainly the case when I worked for a small private school in Georgia in the 90s.) just toss their hands in the air and say, "Nope!"

I just don't know.

And again, academically at least, I know at home is better suited. He's learning. He's in an environment where it's tailored to him and he can get in and get out in short time. But if he really wants those social experiences (although I also worry - and HUGELY worry - that he'd simply become the whipping boy for all the local bullies. Because he is...very bullyable. He's just...innocent and sweet  and honestly not a genius and I know life will kick it out of him at some point, but I would rather it was when he was older and less likely to get life-long scars from it. But maybe that's not a thing.)

Which just serves to send the spiral round again.

This parenting gig isn't for the faint of heart.

Teenagers...

Today, I was feeling a little motivated in the morning (a big win of late), so I dragged my sourdough starter out of the fridge and gave it a feed, thinking I'd give 100% whole wheat another go. (The last experiment, which was the 2nd, turned out almost great, so I'm pleased and thinking I'm on the right path with it.)

Since I seem to attract drafts no matter where I life, I stuck the starter in the oven with the light on so it had a still and warm place to grow.

Everyone knows the light isn't on unless I'm doing this.

Or so I thought.

I came downstairs from my few minutes with eldest's therapist after his session to find the oven pre-heating.

And my starter cooked.

After a near-hysterical meltdown (because my sister gave me that starter) and some time to collect myself, I judged that the very bottom of it might be salvageable.

So I stuck that in a bowl and fed it and we'll see.

I washed the usual jar (baked on starter is surprisingly hard to get off without a good bit of soaking) and tonight I'll transfer over some of the afternoon fed starter to the jar, give it another feed, and see again in the morning if we still have life or if it's just time to start over.

The teenager has been quiet and reserved since this afternoon. I think hubby may have called to explain that his initial response of, "I'm sorry but it's not a big deal." was not the way to go.

Neurodivergence and Hoarding

Since both boys have ADHD (well, elder isn't diagnosed, yet, but if he doesn't have it, I'll eat an opossum), one of the "fun" things I keep running into is their inability to get rid of anything. 

Apparently, hoarding and ADHD is a thing. (Who knew? Not I.)

So the fight of cleaning rooms is ongoing and terrible, because they have all the scraps and broken things making messes, but they are unwilling or unable to just let them go.

We finally reached the tipping point with youngest (and we are getting there with eldest, I just have to gird my mental loins a bit because I know I'm going to get attitude) and I cleaned his room for him. And the next step is for me to grab allllll the bins out of his room and sort them. I will get rid of random McDonald's toys and scraps of paper and broken things. I will sort things by type. And then he will be given access to a fraction of them at a time.

I feel like I should add that this is something I've been lobbying for for years. But hubby insists that they can handle it. Or they should be involved in the process because they need to learn how. And while, sure, okay, for a neurotypical kid maybe? (But even then honestly I hesitate.) But for ours? That way lies madness.

As we have now seen for long enough that he grudgingly agrees.

Victory! Heh.

I know it's not going to go over with celebrations and cheers, but also? I don't care at this point. All the clutter in his room is hard for him, whether or not he recognizes it.

And elder boy is on notice that if he can't do it himself (he's been given tips and a step-by-step plan for how to accomplish it), then I'm going to help.

I am thankful for several things in the face of this though:

1. They are older and aren't getting a quantity for Christmas, because they have expensive taste

2. Their interests have narrowed, so there really isn't as big a need for a broad spectrum of things.

Driver's Ed

Eldest has, finally, finished his online driver's ed course. There was some mismatching information online (shock, amazement) and I couldn't get a straight answer out of the DMV about whether or not we had to attend the 90 minute parent/teen lecture in person or, because we homeschool, if we could attend online. Varying people said varying things.

But as it turned out, several of his friends all needed to attend, so we went ahead and joined them last night at the high school nearish to us. 

It was as dreadfully boring as I remembered from my own youth.

Still. It's done. Check-mark in the box. And now for more fun things like behind the wheel. I just have to shoot off my form to the DMV to tell them that I will be teaching it myself. Woohoo. 

(I did ask if he'd rather I paid for a behind the wheel class and he said no. So there's that.)

Anyway, progress is being made. Slowly. But it's still progress. Given that he has very little interest in driving (which I still don't get) I'm pleased that it doesn't feel like I'm having to drag him by the scruff of his neck each step down the path.

And it's official...

Eldest took and passed his written test to get his permit today!

I am definitely more excited about this than he is. I drove to the church after taking him out to lunch so he could circle the parking lot a little and give driving a try. After two circuits, he declared, "I'm done."

We'll get there.

In his defense, I did take the minivan rather than the Prius, so for a first driving foray it was kind of advanced. Still, he did well and I'll be nudging him into much practice here going forward. He needs 45 hours behind the wheel (15 of which need to be at night), so we'll get there.

I do struggle a bit with the notion that he's old enough for this, but the math works. So it must be true.

On Ant Farms

Youngest earned an ant farm at his tutoring yesterday. He was very excited about this as it's a prize he's had his eye on for quite some time.

I am...less excited?

However, as I eyed the farm, I thought to myself, "Self, this doesn't look like it has what we need for it be an actual farm instead of death trap."

And so I did a little looking about, and it turns out that said ant farm was supposed to come with nutrient gel. Said gel is meant to be used to fill the farm and then ants you add get to eat and tunnel and live happily while you watch the wonder of creation.

There is no gel. 

I considered suggesting he fill it with sand, but it still begged the issue of food.

In the end, I got on the Zon and ordered him an ant farm that will arrive Sunday that has not only gel, but also ants! This will, hopefully, reduce the carnage that has been occurring with live-caught ants of different species that, shockingly (not) tend to turn the ant farm into a cage match when trapped inside. Much to the chagrin and sorrow of the child.

Honestly.

With a Tuppence for Paper and String

One of my favorite childhood memories is going out to Barranca Mesa to fly kites. We'd go a lot. Mesas were (are, probably) fantastic for kite flying because their very nature causes wind. There's always good wind on the mesa.

We had a ton of kites growing up. And when we'd go to Santa Fe, we would very often stop in the Unicef store and look at all the kites they had for sale. And, on occasion, purchase one. I still have the 12 or so foot long cellophane dragon kite my sister and I pooled our money to purchase one visit. It's probably too fragile to fly these days, but it has lovely memories associated with it.

On moving to Virginia, the kite flying got more frustrating. There are not good, built in locations with a near constant updraft. Plus, life around here is just busier. Still, we did try. And then I grew up and moved on, but I still have always loved kite flying. And every time it gets even a little windy, I have dragged a kite out into our cul-de-sac and tried to get it in the air with varying degrees of success.

Well, youngest has inherited my love of kites. And last week at Costco, we saw a very cool 3 headed dragon kite for $15. And I said, Oh why not, and threw it in the cart.

It is a fantastic kite. The string that it comes with is worth the $15 alone. It's a fantastic reel-style kite string (instead of a plastic circle that you're supposed to just get string burn trying to manage like most cheapish kites come with.) The kite itself is rip stop fabric with flexible rods (not wood). In all, it's a fantastic piece for the price.

And of course, since we got it, he has been dying to try to fly it.

We've taken it out in the front yard a few times and had moderate success (better than we ever did in the cul-de-sac of the old house), but the trees make a wind break and it's been gusty, as well.

But today. Today was perfection. Like a chef's kiss of a day for kite flying. So we finished school and I loaded him in the van with his kite and the two of us went down to the soccer fields that are about five minutes away and we spent about 90 minutes with that beautiful dragon kite soaring up with the turkey vultures who came over to investigate just what it was that was riding on their air currents with them.

I only had to help him for the first ten minutes or so, and then he seemed to get the feel for it. There's a rhythm to flying a kite. You have to feel the tension in the string and know when to reel it in and when to let it out and when to hold it firm. When you shift a little to angle with the wind and when you don't. I'll say this, the kid's a natural.

If he had half as much fun as I did, it was a day he'll remember for a long time.

I can't wait to do it again.