6/17/2021

Thursday Random

Feels like it's always random around here, but there just doesn't happen to be the mental energy for much more. So it is what it is.

Sister is in the hospital currently. Septic, for sure, but potentially other issues. Her magnesium is low and seems content to stay there despite the attempts to change that. Her spirits seem high--or at least as high as possible given the circumstances. She might get to go home tomorrow or the next day, all depends, really, on getting the infection under control.

Hubby and eldest head off to Trail Life camp early Sunday morning (happy Father's day to him!) It looks to be a bout of epic fun in West Virginia -- rafting, paintball, kayaking, and more. Youngest don't have a ton lined up for our week together, though I did sign him up for swim camp. So we'll have 30 minutes of swimming every afternoon, so that's something. Beyond that, maybe some time with friends who have a giant blow up waterslide in their yard.

Dad's hanging in. He has less and less to say every day when I call him, and that's frustrating and sad. I don't know how to try to get him engaged in living again. Sister's situation isn't helping with his depression/denial/disconnect. It's not unexpected, but it's heartbreaking.

With all of the above, I'm finding it all...challenging. Which is, again, expected. If also frustrating and annoying. But this too shall pass at some point.

6/09/2021

On Raising Readers

Maybe it's because I have a lot of homeschool connections, but as the public school year winds to a close, the "Make sure they're reading" madness for the summer seems to kick up all around social mediaville. (It dies off a little in July and early August, then kicks back into high gear again with the start of the public school year.)

One of my favorites (eyeroll) is the "Your kids will read if they see you reading!" (or words to that effect) memes.

Lies. I'm telling you they are LIES.

In line with "If you love math and talk about how awesome it is, your kids will love math too!" (Which I actually never see, but the theory should follow. Except that I adore algebra and eldest now despises it and it makes my heart sad to hear him diss the world's most amazing form of mathematical expression. But there we are. Insult to injury? The kid loves history. I mean really? REALLY? History? Gag.)

Sufficient to say, I am not raising future STEM geniuses. 

Or readers, for that matter.

Eldest can read. But I have to bribe him to do it. This summer, reading is directly tied to time on the Xbox. Because yes, I'm apparently that mom. But my goodness, books are amazing and it breaks my heart that he doesn't agree. Almost as much as his math attitude kills me. Maybe they're tied. Point being: bribery is in full play.

Youngest can sort of read? I'm not even bribing him. It's just required. As in, nothing fun happens tomorrow unless you read to me for thirty minutes today. There have been some days wherein he's tried to call my bluff and say that it'd be all right if he had to stay in his room for the whole day and I had to quickly come up with some amazing thing that he'd be missing out on.

That kid. I tell you.

Well really, both of them.

It makes me stronger?

Anyway, you can do your best and, shockingly, those darn kids are going to turn into their own people with their own personalities. Who knew?

6/03/2021

WTF is Wrong With People?

Hubs has an uncle who just torpedoed his marriage of 30+ years by revealing a mistress of more than 5 years. Kids from the marriage are all out of the house now, so I guess it's okay to walk away?

Regardless, Father-in-Law has decided that Uncle needs to be at their 50th Anniversary celebration this summer because family. Or something.

Uncle is bringing the mistress.

Father-in-Law sends out sanctimonious email about how we need to forgive (and okay, fine, yes. Forgiveness needs to happen. But restoration and reconciliation require repentance. FIL missed those finer points.)

Uncle replies all with comment about how he'll wear his Alabama t-shirts all weekend as it's the closest he can get to a scarlet A.

Um. Really? We're making jokes now? Ha. Ha. Adultery is so hilarious. Oh wait.

I'm ready to cancel the whole sh*t show and eat the fees. 

Or figure out a way to send Jerry Springer an invite.

5/31/2021

Lazy Weekend and Other Random

Well, the weekend passed without much drama. We did go to Dad's and eat and all was well and hubby didn't moan so that was nice. The kids were less amazingly behaved that I would have liked but, well, kids.

Today was a mixture of fixing a few things the HOAzis noted on their usual jaunt about spying on private property. 

I don't mind overly, if I'm honest. I do prefer that everyone keep up their homes and so forth and so on. But I do think it's a bit rich to be cited for needing some siding power washed when I can point out four or five houses that have yet to mow and have actual siding damage. But whatever. Presumably they also were cited. And I guess if the job actually gets done those owners will fix things up or fines etc will continue apace.

And they were simple things to do and it was a nice day to be outside.

I got some other sundries done inside.

We had strawberry shortcake for dessert.

My sister is at the ER as she's been running a fever now for five days and has a lump at the base of her skull that's getting bigger and her fever isn't responding to ibuprofin.

I figure I'll be completely gray from stress in another month or so.

5/28/2021

Rocks and Hard Places

Feels like that's where I live most days.

The latest conundrum is Memorial Day -- wherein our family has been in the habit of having some grilled food together (despite the fact that the gatekeepers feel this is a horrible way to spend the weekend and yadda yadda). 

Sister called last night wondering if there were plans. I told her I was beyond overwhelmed these days and just not up for it, but if she could con Dad into doing all the work, we'd show up. And Hubby, sitting beside me, stiffened.

He gets pissy these days if I plan anything on "his weekends." And...I can't deal with that, either. Because I'm sorry he's stressed at work, really and truly am sorry for that, but life doesn't stop and we have two kids and this is almost for sure the last everything with my sister and possibly my Dad, so...suck it up?

Or I'll go and take the kids and deal with whatever fallout occurs from that.

Eldest is on a "want to earn money so I can spend it" kick. And I guess I'm glad that he realizes he needs to fund his hobbies somewhat, but I also don't love being put in the position of having to now create ways for him to earn money. I'll be glad when he's old enough that I can say, "Great, go get a job." For now, there are chores, but he disagrees vehemently with my valuation of said tasks. I don't know what planet he lives on, but welcome to minimum wage.

Youngest has had an ADHD med switch and I think we've found a great dose (knock everything wood within miles) buuuuttttt he's also developed a rash. Coincidence? Probably not. I'm giving it a few days before I get in touch with the doctor because I'm praying desperately that it's not an allergy to the medication that finally seems to work like we were hoping.

But you and I know that's absolutely what it is. Because this is my life.

So yeah. Back to that sort of blogging and days between where I don't blog because honestly, I'm sick of me too.

5/20/2021

This, That, T'other

Here we are approaching yet another weekend with no posts to show for the intervening time. Mostly because there's very little of interest to say.

I started a book (The Last Librarian) the other day. I'm not sure where I found it, but it was on my kindle and I figured why not (because I was scrolling the offerings looking for something that would catch my interest as that's been a challenge of late). Well, I've also now set it aside. I'm not sure if it's a for sure DNF, but it's definitely a not right now. Premise is post-pandemic new world order burning physical books so that the one-world government can control the information flow and how they're already tweaking the text of Shakespeare and the like (they turned The Hunger Games into a cookbook, which was amusing). And well. It was written in 2015 and I hope the author is having a good laugh now. Or cry.

Throw in that it's a little too narrative for me and it was hard to read on multiple fronts.

I'm intrigued enough that I might get back to it, but I guess we'll see.

Sister did her first round of the clinical trial infusion on Tuesday. Had some reactions during the process but has been relatively side effect free since. So yay? I mean yes, it's a yay, but also the whole thing is overwhelming and even best case scenario from this it's not like she gets to live forever.

No cicadas here in our neck of the woods as yet. For this I am grateful given that youngest has developed a CRAZY fear of flying things thanks to the bees in the basement earlier this spring. Getting him to go outside without long sleeves and two sweatshirts (you wish I was kidding) is an uphill battle with more often than not raised voices involved. With temperatures heading into the 90s for the next several days, you can imagine why I'm not a fan of his clothing choices.

I've managed two bad-ish sunburns since spring started and both have peeled and so my just-under-the-conscious-paranoia about skin cancer is raging.

It's fun to be me.

The boys are off on a campout this weekend with Trail Life. I am looking forward to a Y-chromosome free weekend and hopefully lots of time working on my current book on which I am desperately behind schedule. Because life. 

And it occurs to me that the dog has a Y chromosome, and he'll be hanging with me. So I guess it's a bi-pedal Y-chromosome-free weekend. And I'll take it, as Sleepy Pup is the absolute best in the universe. He is my baby and I am his person and we will be just dandy on our own.

5/10/2021

A Full Weekend

It turned out to be quite the busy weekend -- still full of grief peering over the shoulder, but what can you do.

Eldest had a friend spend the night Friday, then Saturday morning we took the fam over to another friend's home for a birthday party that was more of a family hang out with paintball in the woods for whomever wanted to partake plus cake. Everyone had fun -- except perhaps youngest who also seems to be the one left out. Eldest's friend has a sibling youngest's age, but she's a girl and the other family who joined also has a girl that age, so the two girls glommed together and were uninterested in youngest. And eldest with his friends his age had no interest in youngest and...it's hard to be the youngest sometimes. 

I did what I could, as did hubby, to engage and entertain, but it's awfully rough to be the one kid who doesn't have kids who want to play with you.

I fear more of that is on tap for today as we've a playdate and the friend youngest's age is, again, female, and completely disinterested in anything youngest might enjoy doing and vice versa. 

People say gender doesn't matter but, well, yes it does.

Sunday was church and then an evening cookout with another group of friends this time as a laidback birthday party for youngest's friend (who amusingly is female but happily tomboyish and well content to play with him - so I know it's not all gender, but it certainly can be a factor). Plus there's a younger brother who gets along well enough so the three of them are thick as thieves. Eldest has a friend his age as well among the four siblings (and the second oldest is another tomboy who doesn't mind running with teh older boys) and so there was much fun had by all this time.

Except, of course, that in this family I'm the odd man out as the wife and I have a bit of a fraught relationship. She gets ticked at me for breathing here and there (honestly, I never know what I do that sets it off) and stops speaking to me then eventually gets over and acts like all is well. Any attempts to try and clear the air or figure out what I've done so as to avoid it in the future are stonewalled or dismissed and frankly, it's just so much drama and anxiety to be her friend that I never really enjoy hanging with them until it's over because I don't know what I'm walking into.

Regardless, it's all done now and we're off to a new week. What's in store? No one really knows.