Ok, so usually I'm a "never say never" kind of person - you never (there I go again!) really know what God has for you, so you need to be open to possibilities. However...now that Florida has a Python Problem, I can honestly tell you that I will be limiting my exposure to Florida as much as possible. (Made more difficult, I realize, by the fact that my grad school is located in Fort Lauderdale -- right there near the Everglades and the rampant reptile reproduction.)
I do not get people who like these creatures. I just don't get them. And honestly, I'm not 100% convinced that they're not a direct result of the fall. Certainly they were instrumental -- so why would someone bring a slithering serpent into their home? To remind them of what could've been if Eve hadn't been deceived? If that's really what you need? Invest in apples. (Be they fruit or computers, doesn't matter.)
Snakes are, to quote So I Married an Axe Murderer, "Eeeeviil. Like the froo-its of the De-ville." Bleh.
Oh, one other thing. Why...why why why must news people decide that if they're reporting on an out of control python population they need to sprinkle photos of the stupid things all throughout the article?
One other, other thing. It is not cute to name your pet python Monty. It's just not. Nor is it clever to name them after characters from Shakespeare. "Hi, this is my boa constrictor Hamlet. He can crush you without really realizing what he's doing and then swallow you whole, but hey, isn't it a cute name? Ooops, was that your cat?"
Yeah, I'm going to be looking under my desk all day. Can we say "Pathologically Terrified"? I thought we could.
4 days ago
