It's officially that time of year again

It happens every year at some point. Every person I know is pregnant. (Or at least that would be how it feels.)

To date:
-Tim's cousin
-Tim's other cousin
-Girl in my Sunday school class
-Other girl in my Sunday school class
-Jen
-Tim's other-other cousin just gave birth (so that counts as it was less than a month ago)
-A mutual friend from college and his wife

And now, a PSA for pregnant women everywhere who may know someone who can't have kids (but wishes they could). (These may apply only to me, I don't want to speak for the whole of the infertile world, but at the same time, I've seen the sentiments expressed enough to know they're not completely unique.)

1) Don't expect us to ooh and ahh with sympathy about your constant yakking or weight gain. Honestly, while there may be a little sympathy, most of the time there is just schadenfreude. And while guilt inevitably follows, well, the evil glee is a temporary bandaid for the heart.
2) Do whatever it takes (up to and including keeping a list) to have topics other than your latest symptom/craving/hiccup-that-at-first-you-thought-it-was-a-kick/etc. to talk about. Either that or don't expect a whole bunch of conversations for the next, oh, probably 18 years. (9 months if you can manage to regain interest in more than your latest poopy diaper/burp/projectile vomiting episode after birth. In my experience this rarely happens.)
3) If we're the kind of friend you would've invited to a shower, go ahead and send the invite. Just don't expect us to show. You'll get a gift, but honestly, a room full of women babbling incessantly about delivering their placenta is just not where we want to be.
4) Try to keep a sense of humor about us. We're doing the same. (Maybe you can consider it training for the teenage years - you know, needing to deal lovingly with the irrational.)
5) We won't tell you how to cope with morning sickness and sciatica if you'll keep your thoughts on God's eventual plan for us to yourself. Deal? Cause advice is really only meaningful from someone who's walked in your shoes. Your exact shoes. And no, trying for eight months is not the same as eight years.
6) Don't tiptoe around. Be yourself. (But try to retain some of the pre-pregnant self while you're doing that.) We may get weird now and again and not want to talk to you, it's not you, it's us. And while that sounds lame, sometimes it's better to just let us have our space to feel sorry for ourselves than to force a confrontation that only ends in everyone's feelings getting hurt.