9/27/2013

Drawing Elephants

I read once - and I can't recall when or where - that you knew Gary Larson (of the Far Side) was getting ready for a break in the mental hospital when elephants start cropping up in his comics. I don't know if that's true or if it's just random weirdness you stumble upon as you do, but it's always stuck with me. For whatever strange reason.

True or not - I'm reaching a point right now where I feel like I'm drawing elephants. It's not a secret that I dabble in depression (dabble is so much nicer than struggling, don't you think?) - though usually my medication keeps it mostly at bay. But for whatever reason that's stopped being the case and I find myself trying to figure out exactly what, if anything, there is to do about it. I don't really see the point in therapists. I'm not interested in blaming my parents for anything, and really I pretty much understand the various roots of the problems - and even can identify which parts are rational (very few) and which are irrational (the majority). I don't need help with that.

Our church sponsors a Biblical counseling center, but I can't get past their main page which says that they believe all depression/mental trouble comes solely from having your spiritual life out of whack. While sure, there are aspects of my spiritual life that could be improved - I'd hazard to say that's true of ANYONE's spiritual life. And I just can't see going to someone to have them tell me to pray more and worry less. Because that doesn't fix chemical issues. And there are chemical issues at play here.

Which leaves me a bit adrift. At this point, I'm taking the "this too shall pass" approach - and I hope that turns out to be the case. But it's annoying and frustrating and...well...depressing.

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