Travelling, School, and Skeezy Hotels

So I'm here. And honestly, I haven't been this homesick since I went to camp by myself for the first time in like junior high (I'd been to camp previously, but my sister or a friend always went too.)

I imagine part of the homesickness is due to the fact that this hotel is, frankly, skeezy. It's also mildly terrifying. I think what bothers me the most is that I'm used to hotels - you know, the kind with hallways on the inside that provide a feeling of safety because you think that anyone who might be coming by your room has at least walked by the front desk. This one has outside hallways. And the buildings are separate. The front desk is a looong way away. So I have barricaded my door just a little and, while I feel silly, I also feel a tad safer. That said, however, I won't be taking off my socks. The carpet is probably fine. But why risk it, you know?

The other part of the homesickness is that I'm feeling terribly insecure about going back to school. For a PhD. Gah. I'm trying to remind myself why I thought this was a good idea. And I do have some compelling reasons, I just am having to work to keep them at the front of my mind.

The rest is, well, this area of Florida is just very different from anywhere else I've been so it's almost as if I've traveled to another country (or planet).

Hopefully at least parts 1 and 2 will be mildly taken care of tomorrow when I've survived one night without being eaten alive by a creation of Kafka (haven't seen any beetles or roaches or anything but I just suspect they're there) and when I've survived one day of school and remember that I can actually do this.

That said, I will probably not be as quick to forget that there is a huge difference between personal travel and business travel. I've never had any of these issues when travelling for business. I don't know what the difference is, honestly, (well, except that even the worst hotel I've stayed in for business was better than this hotel could ever dream of being) but...there it is.

And, some of you will be proud of me. Not only am I watching American Idol for the first time ever in my life (there's nothing else on) but I also suspect that I will be watching commercials this evening. Definitely branching out.